Let me tell you what happened in the past 4 days.
Fri afternoon, left sch early to see doc, get medicine for an impending cold invasion. Temp check @ clinic = 38.2deg. Throat imflammation. Terrible muscle ache.
Sat & Sun, in bed 90% of the time. Temp fluctuated between 37.9deg to 38.9deg. Throat still inflammed. Stomach in knots. Tried vomitting and what came out was only clear, sticky, soury internal juice. Spent much time on Sun thinking about things that just happened at work, and deciding future steps to take. Felt better Sun night after talking with dad. Temp down to 37deg. Thought I can make it back to sch today. Need to thrash out some issues with others.
Sun night. Very poor sleep again. Work stuff invaded my dreams once more.
Mon morning. Fever came back. Throat worse. Wondered if it's all worth it, and decided to give myself a break. Man, I really need to save myself. Went to the doc and he said there's PUS on my tonsils now. Need antibiotics. And stomach's bloated with wind - likely stomach flu, my common foe.
I've come to a decision. Not a small one, and (don't worry) definitely not one that is rash nor made under influence of medication. I've decided to "re-find" my happiness/light-heartedness. Management is really not my cuppa tea. Someone else can drink it if he/she wants to.
Game is over. Like Zhang Hui Mei sings - "I want to be happy. I want to be able to sleep well at night."
As long as I have 2 hands, 2 legs, can see, can hear, can talk. I can start anywhere and do anything. Somethings are just not worth it.
1 comment:
Hey
May you look back on these terrible days of illness as the depths from which you emerged to find 'true' happiness.
And may you find your nice big cuppa tea that will sweeten your life the healthy way!
Actually I'm mighty proud of you for making a decision like this. Can take up, can put down kinda attitude. And it's a clarion cry against corrupt conceit. It's their bloody loss!
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